Buying used

"Buy used and save the difference" is the family motto of the Duggars. Stars of their own reality show, "19 kids and counting", the Duggars have been debt free for about 20 years and achieved that status long before their success as reality TV stars. I must admit that I learned this trick later in life. When I first moved out on my own the only thing that was used was my car and honestly that is because I didn't know about bank car loans. When I moved out of my parents house I bought a new television, stereo system, computer, and more. The funny thing is I bought my first computer on credit so that I could track my finances in Quicken!

Now my wife and I are frequent shoppers at thrift stores, Craigslist, and even free things from friends and family. We have also found it best to buy seasonal items (Halloween Christmas, summer clothing, etc.) at the end of the season since they are largely discounted.

Let me give you an example of how much you can save buying used . The first weekend in November, the largest subdivision in our town has a neighborhood garage sale. This year, our first living here, we went and browsed the sales. I was soon asking myself why I would ever pay full retail price for something new when I can buy it used for pennies on the dollar. The answer to that question is simple; I buy things new  because I want it now and am not willing to wait until I can find it for a good deal used. I want it now! Isn't that really the core of many of our financial woes?

Below are the spoils from this year's garage sale hunting. First I list the price we paid for it, then the item description, then what it sells for new.

$1.00 American flag and flag pole $16.97
$2.50 small shredder $20.00
$5.00 Children gate $70.00
$35 surround sound stereo system and DVD player $80 and up
$1.00 three pair gloves $4.00
$.50 Sidewalk chalk $5.00
$1.00 Play dough $6.00
$3.00 Books $50.00
$2.00 multimeter $5.00
________________________
$51.00 paid for $256.97 worth of items

It is important to note that for us our garage sale budget comes from the same budget that groceries do. Since we use cash for that category it keeps us from overspending.  So we will be eating more beans and rice for the next week until our cash envelope gets refilled.

Happy savings!

Weekly family financial meeting

We did it! We had a weekly financial meeting that didn't take over an hour.What is a weekly financial meeting? On Tuesday mornings at 5:00 AM Karoleana and I sit down with the laptop and review the past week's expenses, we insure they are grouped in the correct category, if it is a pay week we fill out the withdrawal slip for filling up our envelopes with cash and we write the tithing check, we discuss any items we need to prepare for and review the progress on our financial goals.

We started our weekly meetings in June of this year and initially it would take us about two hours and often we had some heated discussions. Even now, we occasionally have some heated discussions but they are certainly not full blown arguments and they are usually resolved within a few minutes. Do you have a weekly or at least monthly family financial meeting or does discussing money usually lead to an argument? Finances are the one of the top reasons for divorce. Just Google "financial problems in marriage" and see what comes up.

How do you improve your communication with your spouse so you can discuss finances without arguing. Below are some ideas.

1. Discover your common financial goals. Do you both want to retire with an income that allows you to visit children and/or grandchildren or to serve missions as a senior couple. Do you want to be able to help your children with the costs of college or missions. Do you want to live in a bigger home or go on nice vacations. Agreeing on the "why" you want to manage your finances makes it much easier to discuss the "how" to do it.
2. Gain a testimony of how Heavenly Father wants you to manage his resources. (Remember they are his resources, not yours!) Look up scriptures and conference talks about debt and finances and learn how the church manages their finances.  Elder Bednar's October 2013 conference talk, "The Windows of Heaven" is a great one as well as President N. Eldon Tanner's "Constancy amid Change".
3. Take some private time to ponder and meditate upon why you get stressed about finances. Was your family always struggling financially when you were growing up? Does the idea of managing your finances sound too much like 'controlling' your finances and you hate feeling controlled? Did you grow up with parents that had plenty of money and now it is hard to go without things you could afford while living with your parents?
4. Learn about finances and relationships. How much time do we spend watching our favorite sports or television shows yet we can't find time to read a book about how to improve our relationship with our spouse or how to manage our finances. One of my favorite books about relationships is "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex". My favorite finance book is Dave Ramsey's "The Total Money Makeover". (See me if you would like to borrow a copy).
5. Share what you learned with your spouse. Not in a preachy, "look how you need to change" sort of way but in a "this is interesting, what do you think" sort of way. I think of it like the difference between a golden retriever and a chihuahua. The golden retriever brings you a ball and drops it at your feet as if to say, "I would really enjoy it if you threw this, but I understand if you can't right now". The chihuahua jumps in your face, licks you to death, and barks constantly until you will do anything to get it to go away. (Sorry, if I offended any chihuahua fans.)
6. Find some help. Many years ago my wife and I were going through a tough time in our marriage and we went to see a counselor at LDS Family Services. Wow, that counselor had some great insight and to this day we still refer to some of the skills she taught us. Just like any professional, if you don't hit it off with them keep looking until you find the right one. Also don't forget your bishop is a great resource and you can always attend one of my financial classes.
7. Recognize all change is a process and not a destination. Just like everything else in life, we don't become masters of any skill overnight. It take practice. Remember practice doesn't make perfect, practice makes permanent so be sure you are practicing correctly.
8. Prayer - This probably should have been at the top of the list but don't forget to pray to Heavenly Father. Remember, as with many things in life, he may not remove the challenges we face but he will help us know how to deal with them.